Greg Abbott: Asshole of the Week
Announcing the MBW Asshole of the Week award winner. In recognition of excellence in assholiness and total indifference to the suffering of others, this week's winner is the, everything's bigger in Texas including assholes, gigantic asshole governor: Greg "Give me any situation and I will make it worse" Abbott.
Greg wins this week's award for his work regarding the Mexican border. True to his nickname he has taken bad situations (global inflation and supply shortages) and made them worse. Like many mainstream (aka nuts) Republicans, he tried to out-Trump Trump.
In a blatant political stunt targeting a minority (many of his actions do), Abbott sent officers of the Texas DPS (also home of the notorious Texas Rangers) to fully inspect every truck coming from Mexico. It was an ill-reasoned action that backfired (many of his actions also do this). The stated reason was a tough-on-immigration stance for catching more illegal aliens and contraband. The effect was a stalled convoy of trucks, estimated to be eight miles long, at the border crossing.
Many of those trucks contained produce that rotted while waiting in line. This not only worsened a shortage of produce in the U.S., but since the suppliers cannot afford to 'eat the cost', it will contribute to inflation. Despite Abbott and other Republicans' efforts to blame inflation and everything else on President Biden, this inflation is worldwide and is based on simple supply and demand. The pandemic decreased production and the supposed end of the pandemic increased demand.
But one stupid misstep, however egregiously motivated, does not qualify someone for the AOTW. Greg Abbott has a long history of stupidity and Texas politics. He was appointed to the Texas Supreme Court by George W. where he became famous for his opinion in Da' Cowboys v Da' Bears. His was the only opinion since it was a fictional case assigned to him as a joke.
He was the longest-serving attorney general in Texas history (12 years), where he once sought the death penalty for the sale of nachos without the correct cheese. He also defended the Texas ban against dildos—it seems some things in Texas aren't bigger. As Attorney General, Greg once bragged in a speech, "I go into the office, I sue Barack Obama, and then I go home." He was bragging about wasting Texas taxpayers' money in 31 knee-jerk frivolous lawsuits. But, it wasn't until his current term as governor that he gained the national asshole spotlight.
Since trying to become a Trump clone, Greg has repeatedly repeated the Big Lie and taken actions to distinguish himself as someone without a conscience. He has successfully disenfranchised voters who may not agree with his or his party's position. Abbott has deputized private citizens as abortion bounty hunters. He has threatened the parents of transgender youth with prosecution for child abuse.
In addition to creating a backlog at the border, as part of his PR stunt, he bused new immigrants to Washington, DC. Since it was voluntary, the immigrants likely wanted to go to the DC area anyway. All Greg succeeded in doing was once again waste taxpayer money again on bus fares and provisions.
All of his ridiculous political posturings have not gone to complete waste. It has earned him a place as week #7's Asshole of the Week. Congratulations Greg, you have joined an undistinguished club of scumbags and assholes and you are our first asshole on wheels.
Coming soon: "SLAP JIM" Jordan, a game that is guaranteed to be fun for the whole family
Please feel free to nominate your favorite candidates in the comments.